Double standards

My Motherland is a very conservative nation where even the mere mention of the words: sex, pre-marital sex, live-in relationships is considered taboo. Sometimes, I wonder how my family’s oldest female members would react if I broached this topic with them – their eyes would pop out and they would collectively mourn that the United States has corrupted me beyond reproach (the faith we profess as a family preaches abstinence thus, adding a moral responsibility to our thinking and behavior).

I starting dwelling a little more on the deplorable attitude of Indian men towards pre-marital sex after I read an article on the BBC that the Supreme Court of India has cleared 22 cases of indecency that were filed against the Indian film actress Kushboo – can you guess the crime she committed, I bet you cannot !

You can read the article here: INDIAN ACTRESS KUSHBOO

Actress Kushoo is on record for hinting that it is not wrong for women to indulge in pre-marital sex - provided they take precautions. She also went to say that it is not fair for any educated young man to expect his wife to be a virgin. This statement caused so much outrage in India (especially in Tamilnadu) – she was accused of making culturally derogative, obscene, insulting remarks that agitated the cultural spirit of our nation (only the men folk reacted anyways). Several cases were filed against her in various courts while tomatoes, slippers, eggs, and rotten vegetables were thrown at her – before the court appearances. Worse still, the chief justice of her state declared that these comments were difficult to accept – did he not go school???

The last time I checked the Indian constitution did not changed – it still guarantees the right to freedom of expression to all its citizens equally – yes men and women alike. Do I need to say more?

This entire incident flabbergasted me due to the following reasons:

1.Kushboo has a right to freedom of expression and she was referring to gender-quality and freedom. It is her own sexuality – why are the men folk up in arms against her if she feels that pre-marital sex is not abominable.
2.I like to believe that the Indian judiciary has better things to do than to settle matters like these- the supreme court of India apparently spent a considerable time viewing the transcripts of Kushboo’s interview – give me a break now.
3.Those who are filing these cases against her – do they believe that most Indian girls will be virgins at the time of the marriage. Are these men virgins until marriage?
4.It is pathetic that leading women organizations in the country did not stand by Kushboo to defend her views. The organizations did not have to concur with Kushboo’s stand but they could have raised a voice against the serious breach of Kushboo’s freedom to sexuality.
5.Most women ignored it, why did they not stand up and voice their support for her? I may not agree with her owing to my religious convictions – but that would not stop me from showing my respect for her opinion.
6.Why did the entire society react so violently when she expressed “HER OPINION” – she did not pass a law or an act – when will we learn to respect individual opinion?

The most important question to me now is ‘WHY DID ONLY MEN PERSECUTE HER WHEN SHE MADE THESE REMARKS? Are they worried that they may not be able to get virgin-wife’s at their wedding? And, are women in India fine with this kind of attitude – should men decide what, when, where and with whom women will have sex? Who gets to decide these moral codes of conduct - the men of our society, who help run Indian brothels? Why don’t women insist that their husbands be virgins at the time of the wedding – double standards - Shame ! Shame! Shame!